“The Chinese philosopher Confucius (551–479 BC) put forth the notion of a social self—a self inextricably linked to the life of others. Each person is not morally autonomous, but a social being whose identity derives from his interaction and conduct within the broader human community. Central to a healthy and enlivened social self is the core virtue known as Ren, which means ‘benevolence,’ ‘human kindness,’ or ‘what ties one to another.’ Ren is what holds community together. In his Analects, Confucius tells us that Ren depends on ‘trying to see things from other people’s perspectives, and then to do one’s best for them with that in mind.’ Confucius believed that every person has the capacity of Ren within them, which manifests when a virtuous person treats others with humaneness.”
—Mark Nepo, More Together Than Alone
Sister Betty Daugherty, Prairiewoods foundress, had a habit of pushing books. She was a voracious reader herself, which contributed to what I think of as her “super power”: an unerring sense of what book someone else might need in a given moment. In the nearly five years I knew her, my office mailbox regularly held new treasures which, almost magically, elucidated something I was struggling with or opened my thinking to an idea with broad implications for my own life or my leadership.
The last book gifted to me in this way by Sr. Betty was Mark Nepo’s 2018 More Together Than Alone: Discovering the Power and Spirit of Community in Our Lives and in the World. I have been slowly making my way through this timely work, and I can’t help but feel Sr. Betty’s presence as I do. While I don’t believe Sr. Betty somehow knew exactly what was coming in 2020 (she died in December), I do believe she was a woman of vision who sensed we were entering a time of deep transition with huge implications for our Earth community.
Thanks to Sr. Betty, I am learning and synthesizing concepts such as Ren, ahimsa and MLK’s notion of “Beloved Community.” According to Nepo, they are “forms of connection that awaken the social self. These Hindu, Chinese and African-American traditions are virtues that make community possible.” Given the confluence of coronavirus/COVID-19, the protests against racism and injustice, and the cries of our Earth for environmental justice, it feels like an exploration of community—what it means and how I am part of it—is immensely important.
And so I leave you today with these questions I discovered in Mark Nepo’s book, lovingly forwarded from Sr. Betty to me—and now to you:
“When we understand that there are many ways to live together, peace begins. A deep call for our involvement comes from an anonymous letter attributed to a Hopi elder from Oraibi, Arizona. The excerpt pertains to any age, but especially to our own:
You have been telling the people
that this is the Eleventh Hour.
Now you must go back and tell them
that this is the Hour!
And there are things to be considered:
Where are you living?
What are you doing?
What are your relationships?
Are you in the right relation?
Where is your water?
Know your garden.
It is time to speak your truth.
Create your community.
Be good to each other.
And do not look outside yourself
for the leader.
This could be a good time!”—Mark Nepo, More Together Than Alone, p. 253
—Jenifer Hanson, Prairiewoods director